My wordpress Dashboard has ever-so-slightly changed, and I’m getting used to it. I like the new layout. My car’s dashboard is very dusty and I need to clean it. I don’t like it when my car is dirty. It needs an oil change.

This blog is silly. This entire front page is really just a front for my photographs. I’m beginning to feel like an old man who’s running a laundromat just for the sake of having a ‘legitimate’ business while all his friends are actually shooting craps in the alley.



Waiting for the appliance repair technician is slow like Christmas. They should work that into the Nutcracker ballet.

Brown Eyed Women

I like this song, and I’ve been listening to it all day. When I drove to the Home Depot I listened to it on repeat all the way there, and all the way home, and now I’m listening to it as I clean the kitchen. It’s a nice song. Jerry Garcia played 2,314 concerts with the Grateful Dead and it took him the better part of three decades. I doubt I can listen to an eight minute song that many times in three weeks.

Gone are the days when the ox fall down,
Take up the yoke and plow the fields around.
Gone are the days when the ladies said “Please,
Gentle Jack Jones won’t you come to me.”

Brown-eyed women and red grenadine,
The bottle was dusty but the liquor was clean.
Sound of the thunder with the rain pourin’ down,
And it looks like the old man’s gettin’ on.

1929 when he stepped to the bar, drank to the dregs of the whiskey jar.
1930 when the wall caved in, he made his way selling red-eyed gin.

Delilah Jones was the mother of twins,
Two times over and the rest were sins.
Raised eight boys, only I turned bad,
Didn’t get the lickins that the other ones had.

Tumble down shack in Big Foot county.
Snowed so hard that the roof caved in.
Delilah Jones went to meet her God,
And the old man never was the same again.

Daddy made whiskey and he made it well.
Cost two dollars and it burned like hell.
I cut hick’ry just to fire the still,
Drink down a bottle and be ready to kill.

Gone are the days when the ox fall down,
Take up the yoke and plow the fields around.
Gone are the days when the ladies said “Please,
Gentle Jack Jones won’t you come to me.”

Bug Stuff

I sprayed a wasp nest that the wasps have been building on the back porch, and then I spent the entire day feeling badly that I’d actually killed a wasp. I destroyed his home, covered him in foam, and choked it to death. I then spent the entire day at work thinking that when his family got home they’d all be freaking out and crying about the one I’d killed. I’m not cut out for this shit. Couldn’t they have just kept their nests in the shed where I already TOLD them I wasn’t going to spray them unless it gets huge and out of hand?

I know a kid who has recently started his paperwork to join the army. I agree with the concept, but after my reaction to killing one wasp, I know I couldn’t do it.

There is still a garbage strike going on.

The Sun is Rising

I’ve spent the entire night watching the first season of Eastbound and Down. It’s pretty much the greatest show ever. Between the Sarah Silverman Show and now this, I think I have enough bad language and awkward situations. I love it. The title sequence reminds of the Dukes of Hazzard.

One of my favourite lines from the season?  “Honey I love you, I think you’re a terrific girl, but you have clothes like a fucking dickhead.”

More Party Pieces

Laura Falling

Oh Laura, no, you are not doing it right at all.

Virginia Stallin

Oh Virginia knows where it's at.